Small and untimidating

That's how I think many people look at me. Sometimes I really hate my size. I'm too damn bloody short and I have too childish a face to look professional. Really irks me. I try very hard to get the respect but it's only when people have not seen me and only hear my voice over the phone that they give me some form of respect. Grrr~~

I'm going for my first Zumba class today!! Yosh! And of all days I have to kena my period TODAY also. Zong Toto also not so zun. Having slight cramps and keep feeling like I need to shit. Did so twice today already man. My bowels also one kind. When I got back from my trip, I couldn't shit for days till I had to resort to taking pills to release. Then as soon as I released it started to release non stop. My digestive system trigger happy leh!

I am listening to Class 95 now as I type this and just awhile ago I heard this song by Alexandra Burke called "Bad Boys" and the lyrics go like this.

[Flo Rida]
(Bad Boys, Bad Boys)
Alexandra Girl I know what you like
(Bad Boys, Bad Boys)
Oh, oh (Bad Boys, Bad Boys)
Hey, yeah (Bad Boys, Bad Boys)

[Alexandra]
Some people call them players
But I’m far from terrified
Cos somehow I’m drawn to danger
And have been all of my life
It feels my heart’s divided
Half way ‘tween wrong and right
I know I’m playing with fire
But I don’t know why

Yeah the bad boys are always catching my eye
(Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)
I said the bad boys are always spinning my mind
(Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)
Even though I know they’re no good for me
It’s the risk I take for the chemistry
With the bad boys always catching my eye
(Ooh Way, Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)
Oooooh, bad boys

Some think it’s complicated
But they’re straight up fun for me
I don’t need no explanation
It’s nothing more than what you see here
My heart still feels divided
Halfway ‘tween wrong and right
I know I’m playing with fire
But I don’t know why

Yeah the Bad Boys are always catching my eye
(Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)
I said the bad boys are always spinning my mind
(Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)
Even though I know they’re no good for me
It’s the risk I take for the chemistry
With the bad boys always catching my eye
(Ooh Way, Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)

[Flo Rida]
I know you want me shawty cos I’m a (bad boy)
Hey s-shawty can’t help it she so so addicted to them rougher fellas
With even the alphabet she only sings the crooked letters
Let mamma take all the risks
For that chemistry she like them tougher than leather
By any means necessary, girl
She likes them ruthless, that’s my world
It’s not the news it’s what I heard
To get them more the merrier
It’s not a big surprise
I know them bad boys catch your eyes
Look at her walk when I go in disguise
You’ll have them shawty don’t worry you fly

[Alexandra]
Yeah the Bad Boys are always catching my eye
(Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)
I said the bad boys are always spinning my mind
(Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)
Even though I know they’re no good for me
It’s the risk I take for the chemistry
With the bad boys always catching my eye
(Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)
Yeah the Bad Boys are always spinning my mind
(Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)
I said the Bad Boys are always catching my eye
(Ooh Way, Ooh Way, Ooh Wah)
Bad boys, bad boys

For some reason I use to associate with this song. I use to think that I would only attract lousy shitty guys who would only hurt me in the end. It never occurred to me that a decent boy will ever take a second look at me. I mean which guy in his right mind will even consider a girl who works in my industry? Aren't girls like me considered floozies and loose like hell? I'm not being negative or bitter here ah. I'm saying this coz I have guy friends who tell me that they will never consider a girl in my line as a proper gf and wife material. What will they tell their parents?

Me: "Tell them your gf is doing marketing in a respectable dance club in Singapore. There's nothing to be embarrassed about what."

(-_-)"

I'm taking no sides here. Just being realistic. As much as I will someday hope to leave this industry, I cannot deny that this place is home too. Of coz I feel angry, irritated, frustrated at times but isn't all these part and parcel of a job? I admit alot of the passion for the industry is lost but it doesn't mean I should use that as an excuse to slack off and not even do my part.

I am so tempted to just do a weekender with him when he's back. Probably just head to Genting or something. Anyway Genting isn't part of Malaysia so the political riots in KL aren't much of a concern. Anyway maybe by then half of the rioting population have been killed already. *rolls eyes* Ok yes I'm bias. Sorry la! As much as I love my Malaysian colleagues and nice Malaysian friends, I'm not for the whole Malaysia boleh thing.

There are these little fruit flies flying around in my office. Probably comes from the store room where all the drinks are stored. They are damn irritating! Keep flying in front of your face and coz they are so quick, you can't hit them in time to kill the little bastards.

Ok I'm done. For now. Bye.

Tolora