Troubled

I woke up from a startling yet rather romantic weird ass dream this morning which left me with a bittersweet taste in my mouth. The amazing thing is, I can still remember it so clearly up till now.

I dreamed of HIM again and this time, even though he knew I am already married, he propositioned to me to go with him, to be with him and leave my husband. I was perturbed in my dream, for some reason knowing it definitely wasn't real and I wouldn't leave my husband to go with him. The dream took a turn at this juncture and my husband somehow came to know about this and of course got mad and ran away. Now I had the option to either go look for my husband or look for HIM and whatever my decision was, I was going to follow that guy.

Guess who I chose?

HIM.

Win liao lor this brain of mine. In my dream also can tekan me until lidat.

And as I hugged HIM, it felt right yet wrong at the same time. I couldn't make out any strong emotions there and then and I didn't know what or how to feel. I just basically went with what my subconscious wanted me to go.

Suddenly I was pulled back and ended up somewhere where I saw my husband in the distance with his back towards me. I walked up to him and hugged him and said something to the effect of "I will never let you go no matter what happens" and then all of a sudden, I was pulled to a scene where the 2 of them were standing in front of me but with their backs towards me. It seemed like they were in 2 different worlds, 2 different places and yet I could see them as clear as day. This time, my subconscious told me that I had to choose one and go towards that one and once I've made my choice, I could never turn back.

That's when my alarm clock went off.

I'm for some reason exhausted from the dream. It feels like my brain was working throughout the night and my heart was pounding at an unusually faster pace throughout the whole 'drama'. My head was racing with so many thoughts and snippets of the dream kept creeping in, rousing me from whatever was happening in the world around me.

Is this a sign or am I just thinking too much? I don't know why I keep having these dreams sporadically. All I know is, it hurts whenever I do. It almost feels like I could die of a broken heart.

Tolora